Great Expectations

I officially leave in 15 days. People have been asking me, "Are you excited?" And I can quickly and enthusiastically answer, "Yes!" But, for the sake of honesty, I often add, "...but I am also pretty nervous, and a little overwhelmed at all that needs to be done before leaving." People are pretty understanding of this, as I imagine anyone who has gone through a big life transition has probably experienced this same tension. I'm looking forward to this next step, but it brings with it many unknowns.

In my weakest moments, it is easy to let fears creep in. What if I'm not cut out for this type of ministry? What if I get sick? What if, what if, what if? Of course, I know that it does no good to spend time thinking about everything that could possibly go wrong. During one conversation with a friend about my nervousness, she reminded me that this is something I am feeling called to. My main purpose in going is to serve God and His people, and as long as I keep that as my goal first and foremost, nothing else matters.

So instead of dwelling on my fears, I am trying to examine my expectations. It's only natural to have some expectations, and I think a big challenge is to remain optimistic, but keep expectations as realistic as possible. While I wholeheartedly believe this is the right next step in my life, I also know it is not always going to be easy. I want to prepare myself for the inevitable imperfection in all areas of this next step, such as my living space, the people I will encounter, the new language, the food, the weather, the ministry, etc., but I want to do so in an optimistic way, trusting that God will use everything, good or bad, for his purposes.

During this time I've also decided to set myself a few goals for my time in Ivory Coast. Hopefully this will help to keep me on track when I am feeling overwhelmed.

1) Invest time and energy into learning and practicing the language and the culture

2) Gain a strong understanding of CMF's current ministry in Ivory Coast, and future dreams/plans

3) Get to know people--spend time with them, ask them questions, and really listen to their answers

4) Find my niche in the ministry
5) Grow in my love for God by spending time with Him and His people
6) Seek guidance and wisdom about the next step in my life, and how I can remain involved in God's mission in the world

Please pray with me as I finish up this preparation, physically, spiritually, and emotionally.